Dating tends to be fun and easy, especially when you start dating or early in your marriage. However, along the way comes detachment, fighting, and frustrations, which eventually complicates matters and your connection. Even the best relationships go through lots of challenges.
Sadly, most people spend time trying to discover ways to fix a marriage instead of enjoying it. Check out these things that a married couple can do to repair a relationship.
- FIND OUT THE MAIN ISSUE AND ACKNOWLEDGE IT TOGETHER
The first step may be a big one, but it is undoubtedly crucial. You both need to understand what caused a rift between you two and acknowledge the mistake as one unit. You have a better shot at saving your marriage if you both know what you are dealing with and its severity.
- MAKE A COMMITMENT
Secondly, before making an effort, it is essential to be committed to the cause. You need to understand the seriousness of the issue and set your heart towards repairing your marriage. You need to invest your heart in rebuilding what you lost.
- ELIMINATE THE OBSTACLES
At this point, you have already figured out what obstacles are blocking your path to a happy marriage. These obstacles mainly occur if one or both of you has failed in at least one of the four hindrances required in building a healthy marriage. These include; untrustworthiness, unfriendly interactions, feeling betrayed, and not forgiving.
Focus on eliminating these obstacles.
- REFLECT INWARDS INSTEAD OF FOCUSING ON YOUR PARTNER’S FLAWS
Often it gets unbearable if your partner is constantly expecting you to live up to their specifications. Note that it is practically impossible to change a person. Instead, focus most of the energy on changing yourself and your traits that may negatively influence your marriage. It is also essential to understand that there are limits to the things you can change. Ensure you communicate them out loud for your partner to understand and decide whether they can cope.
- COMMUNICATE OPENLY
Chances are communication, or lack thereof could have caused the rift between you two. Relationship experts advise an open and candid communication flow. Speak out your mind without fear. “Individuals who have an assertive communication style can clearly advocate and identify their needs and feelings without disrespecting the needs and feelings of their partner and they value their own needs as well as the needs of their partner.” says Amy Shaw of Skinner Psychotherapy
While there are limits to how you can communicate, ensure you don’t hide anything from your spouse. Never be afraid to initiate a conversation when you are both calm and relaxed with no distractions.
Open communication can guarantee you will meet your spouse halfway.
- TALK TO AN ONLINE THERAPIST
It is always a good idea to get the opinion of a third party. Online therapy works immensely, especially during this pandemic. However, online therapy should not always be your last resort. It is always a good idea to determine the need for professional marriage counselling as soon as you notice any negative change, and both acknowledge it.
THE BOTTOM LINE
Repairing a marriage is possible. It takes mutual effort to decide what you want for your marriage. Relationship experts recommend avoiding random advice from friends and family. Professional online therapy is usually a big step towards repairing a marriage but ultimately worth the effort.